Don’t Rein It In: The Necessary, Unrepentant Weirdness of My Horse Prince

My Horse Prince

Umaya Co.
December, 2016.

Let’s get this out of the way: My Horse Prince is not a good game. It might even be a bad game, like a clicker crossed with a dating sim and made purely for those sweet free-to-play ad dollars.


Life is Meaningless: A New Life’s Arbitrary Choices Make a Shallow Experience

I’m on my eighth reincarnation. This time around, my strengths are my health and my charisma, though my wealth is nothing to sneeze at, either. I decide to live a reckless life–I cheat on my spouse, I choose danger over peace, and I treat myself to the finer things in life. My spouse dies young and I move to Alaska with our adopted child, taking on a job as an insurance underwriter to keep us afloat under my extravagant lifestyle. I make it to age 78 and look back at my achievements, but most of them aren’t very interesting other than the time I chose breast implants over having a child.


Shall We Date?

Game Review: Riverdale Rescue

Archie Riverdale Rescue

Developer: Gogii Games Corp.
Platforms: iPhone, iPad, Android, PC

Though I was exposed to computer games at an early age, I don’t claim a gamer identity. As a youngster, I had an unhealthy obsession with games. I was the brat who would pout and refuse to play if I realized there was no way I could win. I was not above cheating—I can still stack a card deck—and if I wasn’t playing a game, I would plot how to win. I’m just saying all this to emphasize that I can’t be trusted to game responsibly.


Phone Game Review: Threes


Price: $1.99 Google Play; $2.99 Apple Store
Developer: Asher Volmer and Greg Wohlwend
Platform: Android; iOS

I’m obsessed with Threes, and I’m sharing my obsession with you. Threes is a number matching game for smartphones. The game is similar to 2048, but better. Unlike 2048’s late 60s era harvest gold minimalism, Threes is stinking cute, and features fun design elements throughout that keep you interested. The game costs about two bucks, but then never asks for money again. You get unlimited turns and can play all day without having to pony up for another “life,” which I much prefer over the freemium model that constantly begs for money. (more…)