Sidequest’s Definitive Ranking of Sword Dads, Part I
“I’m starting The Witcher 3 and Geralt is my dad now.” I made this bold declaration on Twitter as I began my 130+ hour love affair with The Witcher 3, which to this day remains one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It took playing a few other games to realize I have a type when it comes to games. I call this genre “Sword Dads.” Like the name implies, these games have at least one character with a daditude (that’s a “dad attitude” for you newcomers) and an often comically large sword.
I categorize Sword Dads loosely. Blood relation to a child can be a factor, but it isn’t necessary. A Sword Dad can be anyone, really. What matters is having a sort of fatherly attitude/mentoring role/proclivity for dad jokes aimed at a younger character. Per the name, a Sword Dad will also ideally carry a big sword or two, though other weapons may count, too.
We love Sword Dads here at Sidequest and are excited to bring you a definitive ranking of the most dangerous, dadliest dads in video games.
Editor’s note: The following entries may contain spoilers. See a Dad from a game you don’t want to be spoiled for? Skip it! Also, you’ll notice below that the nominees aren’t ranked—you, the reader, will have the power to decide on the ultimate Sword Dad. Give us your thoughts below!
Editor’s note 2.0, 1/7/2019: Vote on best Sword Dad right through here! Each tier will last 24 hours, so vote right the heck now.
Madison Butler is Sidequest’s self-proclaimed jock editor. She co-founded the blog Critsumption and once got really into powerlifting via Fitness Boxing for the Nintendo Switch. She tweets at @_maddilo.